THREE BUSY B'S

Moving To Wordpress

2008-08-23T16:01:00.000-07:00

Hi all, I'm moving the blog over to Wordpress. The new one is Shooting Practice. I hope you will update your links. Pretty please?

I've wanted to try Wordpress for a while, so I figured I better make the move now, before the ankle heals. I also ditched the title of Three Busy B's although we are three and we are quite busy. Both Paul and Briones have their own blogs now and I wanted to try more of a focus. Who knows? Maybe wordpress won't work out and I'll be back here. Thanks for being patient with me, see ya over there!

2008-08-21T19:50:00.000-07:00

"They deem me mad because I will not sell my days for gold; and I deem them mad because they think my days have a price."

-Khalil Gibran

Taking notes

2008-08-20T13:14:00.001-07:00

Sit around and watch the cat. When he's hungry he eats. When he's tired he sleeps. When he's grumpy he's grumpy. He doesn't complicates things and he's perfectly content.

Living in the moment and not living a lifetime of complicating things with self inflicted tail chasing. Do you ever truly view your life strictly one day at a time? One task, one occasion. Then move on to the next, without spending energy fretting about what is supposed to happen after, later, if and when. I lost my calendar a little while ago (it's still a mystery) and I was really worried for several days. Reasonably anxious. I tried to piece together things and appointments from memory. Then, the injury happened and I wouldn't have been able to go anywhere anyway. So I just let the anxiety go. Because I was forced to.

Can you hear what I hear today? It's peace and it's subtle but it's nice and it's different. I hope to retain some of this when I do get back on my feet.

If you have a chance, look through Jamie Livingston's a polaroid-a-day . He was a man who took a polaroid a day for almost 20 years (over 6,000). It's a stunning witness of the frail and fleeting moments of a life and the beauty of the everyday ordinariness of the passage of time. But, start with this if you want a great and quick recap of the whole project. It's awesome and eerie all at the same time!

Tuesday

2008-08-19T19:37:00.001-07:00

Thinking of all things beautiful today.

*A beautiful and long awaited day for a special friend, who has worked so hard and is amazing & beautiful & always inspiring.

*Watching Briones 'cook' breakfast in the morning. And then eating it.

*Noticing the light in Briones' eyes while I explain that 'art' should have no rules whatsoever, and then watching her proceed to cut turquoise tulle fabric to make a pair of shorts...for the cat.

*Finding random blog posts like this one and this one, that for no particular reason make me feel happy.

Tate Modern

2008-08-18T11:16:00.000-07:00

Pinch me now! I am dreaming. Okay, that hurt. I am in disbelief right now. A San Francisco photo I took earlier this spring was chosen in a contest by Tate Modern in London. Besides never ever winning anything, I am so excited that my little photo will enjoy some time overseas (lord knows, someone ought to!).

In conjunction with the exhibition Street & Studio: A History of Urban Photography, Tate Modern invites you to contribute your own urban portraits to be shown in the gallery, and to have the chance to be part of the Street or Studio user-generated photobook.

ABOUT THE EXHIBITION

Street & Studio: A History of Urban Photography at (Tate Modern 22 May – 31 August 2008) presents a history of photographic portraiture: taken on the street or in the photographer’s studio.

It contrasts carefully orchestrated studio shots with images captured in the changing and uncontrollable street, highlighting the crossovers between the genres and their influence on each other.

Click here to see the 100 pics chosen (out of 3,255).

black n' white

2008-08-17T15:42:00.000-07:00

Sundays. Lazy mornings spent robed and well read. A day for forgiveness. Time to enjoy weekend finds at a library book sale. A day of reflection..the past week and the one to come. What worked, what didn't.

Perspective

2008-08-16T16:06:00.000-07:00

I'm putting together a BLURB book of family photos. It's also a decluttering of sorts. With literally thousands of pictures on the computer from the last 5 years or so (thank you digital), I thought it would be cool to have the best assembled in one nice glossy hardcover book.

The perspective you can gain from leafing through photos of previous years is so valuable. Especially those of family, holiday dinners and moments shared. Oh, how quickly people come together or grow apart. Today, I am one step closer to understanding how things were, how they changed, what they've become. What they could be.

Soup for the Soul

2008-08-15T13:28:00.000-07:00

My recent sentencing: Mandatory Sedentary Behavior. What to do?

Lots of phone calls. I've never been one for the phone, so this is a nice change.

Computer time. Believe it or not, this gets old real fast.

Homeschooling and lots of snuggles and hugs. Awesome.

Barking orders. This can be fun.

Meal Planning. Very important.

Feeling Guilty. Oh yeah.

Watching Edward Scissorhands for the third time. (Briones' choice). I'm happy to oblige.

Feeling Incredibly Thankful for everyone who has taken Briones out this week..entertained and wore her out. Heather = 6 Hours = Goddess.

Folding Laundry. Arranging drawers so nicely and then rearranging them again.

A friend came by yesterday to bring some get well love and goodies. This is a woman after my own heart. What did she bring? Chicken Soup, no. A batch of cookies, no. A stack of magazines, no. Something even better. A tripod. A TRIPOD. It's scary when someone knows you all too well. She also slipped in dvd's by the inspirational Me Ra Koh Photography. Can't wait to watch this weekend while my family is out soaking up the end of summer rays. Thank you!!

Pieces

2008-08-13T21:56:00.000-07:00

I don't know what to say today other than I have spent the last 3 days being angry. And cussing. And crying. And in a fog. And wishing I had a tantalizing story about how I've injured myself. It happened while practicing capoeira on a mountain top. No, it happened while I was racing unicycles. You know how I roll.

Actually, it really happened while I was walking down stairs with platform flip flops and I rolled it over to the outer side fast and furious and BAM..a torn ligament on the outer ankle. I think I would have preferred a broken bone (seriously) because this prognosis seems messy and long and painful and full of "IF's". If after 4-6 weeks of not walking on it, the swelling has gone down, than we will start the rehab. If we can avoid excessive scar tissue than.. If this..than that. If this..than that. I recall wishing to learn about living in the moment..so here it is!! A good exercise in doing just that.

-Here's to taking it easy.

-Catching up on that (long) reading list.

-Sexy arm muscles from crutches.

-Letting go..

-Remembering that it could be worse.

-Sit and Be Fit (this is a running joke in my house, but I'm really going to give it a try)

-Reminding myself that nothing is ever easy with me. Nothing. Ever. I always have to take the long way around.

-Accepting help.

-Trusting and loving my family for holding up the fort.

Mileage

2008-08-10T19:27:00.000-07:00

We went to San Francisco in search of a particular statue of a greenish midget that my family is currently obsessed with. I am very relieved that we ended up finding it.

I love the city. When I was 18 and 19 I lived there, went to school there, got into a lot of trouble there. It never fails though. Every time I visit, it feels like I am seeing it for the first time.

Golden Gate Bridge from Fort Point

Ballroom at the Officer's Club in the Presidio

Lovelies

2008-08-10T09:17:00.000-07:00

Judgement Day

2008-08-09T13:04:00.000-07:00

Lately, time is measured by penciled in wall growth charts, hair cuts, and new tae kwon do belts.

We have a new graduate today, a green belt!! I remember when Briones first started karate, I watched the green belts with awe. What big kids they seemed. Well, here we are.

Hard Core

2008-08-08T09:33:00.000-07:00

I am feeling better today, a bit more grounded. I've made myself dizzy trying to define authenticity and finding where I might even begin to locate my own.

I have an idea though where I can start.

Yesterday, I had the treat of being able to photograph a good friend who is going through an exceptionally trying transition of her own..and is at the time now where she is finally coming..no, blossoming.. into her own. It's amazing to watch. I wanted to give her some pictures of herself and family for her birthday next week.

It was great to get the littlest girly girls together too. I told Briones that I knew that her & Sarina were going to be friends forever.

"No, mom. Friends come and go. Family is forever."

I just about melted. She's pretty much right on, though. With one exception.

I told her, "Except for the friends that decide to stick around. Through the good, bad and the ugly. They become your core."

"Like an apple?"

"Like an apple."

I'm not sure where we were going with the fruit metaphor, but I think she gets it. And I totally get that I have occasionally been neglectful of my own core crew at times throughout the years...sometimes because I am so full throttle ahead, in search of what, I often do not know. I am so grateful for my friends, who wait patiently for me to figure out often what they already know.

So, I thank Angie for this gentle reminder. I have to go make some phone calls now. :)

Fine Tuning

2008-08-05T15:48:00.000-07:00

my little girl. Sometimes, I think she's more self-actualized than I am. I learn so much from her, every day.

I am not healthy yet, but I believe I am now seriously pointed in the right direction. I probably should have waited to write this until after my evening run, because there's something about a good sweat that puts a gentler, more clarified spin on just about anything. But, knowing that even a month ago I would have been reluctant to have written about anything too personal (certainly not my health), I know big changes are here and near.

Today I am feeling emotionally drained..like I don't have my usual coat of armour on. Yes, it's just one of those days, but it's also so much more than that. It's also day 9 of no soda (gasp), no candy or sugar (gasp,gasp), very little wheat, zero processed foods, no cheese, and no milk. My family is still eating some of these things, but that's something for another blog post. So, in this premature stage of getting my health on track, I am sticking with things that sound good: chicken, spinach, salmon, apples, brown rice, eggs, broccoli, pinto beans, corn tortillas and salsa. Oh, and lots and lots of mineral water..my favorite. I'm not totally set in stone (in fact, I plan to splurge a little on Sat. when friends come) but I think we are on to something.

So, things are good on one hand, and shaky on the other. The good is that my skin's a little softer, I am feeling a little lighter, I am losing the urge to cram my face with whatever is in my path, and it feels like I am coming out of a fog. The shakiness is the part where I am just plain feeling more in general. I am stunned by the inter connectedness between better health and honesty. (Who would have thought?). This is turning out to be so much more than losing weight. For me, my dissatisfaction with my body is directly correlated with my dishonesty towards myself. Who stuffs their face and says.."YUM, this is so great. Overgorging and eating unwisely makes me feel like such a wonderful person. Hooray!" ?? As the pattern continues, you begin rationalizing and lying to yourself. No one wants to feel like a total loser. You know, I think it becomes much easier to walk around in a fog and hide under belly rolls and to smile even when you aren't feeling happy. The hard part is changing that. This is hard.

And so, my question to myself has now become..what else have you been dishonest about? How authentic have you been with people?

There's so much more I want to say about this, but I think I'll stop here for now, before I get myself into trouble..hee hee.

There's big changes going on here people. Two things of which I want to work on -- health and honesty. I'm walking a tightrope..very gingerly, but ultimately firm in my resolve: I will not continue to sell myself short to appease others and I will not share cholesterol medication with my 82 year old grandma. Seriously, that is just not cool. And, by the time a new blood panel comes around, there will be a significant reduction in my cholesterol. Among other things. Come Hell or Highwater.

Internet Toys

2008-08-04T09:55:00.000-07:00

It is so amazing to me what's available online (for free!) these days. I could totally see a future gift idea in the works with this PhotoFunia here.

How about a Wordle. It's a computer generated 'word cloud' that picks out the more prominent words from any text. This one below is from the front page of my blog. See, adults like toys too.

Saturday Snapshot

2008-08-02T21:23:00.000-07:00

Stop taking pictures. Eat your broccoli!

Saving Myself

2008-08-01T19:35:00.000-07:00

Day 5 of hitting the track. Very humbling experience. The initial soreness has worn off by now so things are looking good. I also finally discovered one benefit of living in suburbia. Everyone's fat so the local track is empty and all mine :) Yep, I said it..FAT. fat fat fattttttttt. Since when did this word become so dirty? I am fat. And according to my doctor, I've got 45 days before he wants to put me on cholesterol medication. Now that's a dirty word.

I'm not sure I've ever been so scared and excited simultaneously. Confused as well. Especially coming from a hardcore athletic family of bike racers and fanatical runners. But my poundage came quietly within the last 2 years or so..paralleled with extraordinary family transition and stress. I barely noticed my physical changes going on.

The Good News: It's totally reversible. And I like to run. I'm a little rusty but the motion fits like a glove. I competed in high school so picking it up again feels like reacquainting with an old friend.

The Bad News: Menu shifts, counting calories...grrrr. I'm grumpy and my feet hurt. I've got to get over the hump.

August calendar notes

2008-07-31T09:04:00.000-07:00

*My mom's birthday

*To winning an armwrestle with sedentary habits

*Paul's motorcycle school

*Finding hills and climbing them

*A dying off garden and a new crop underway (?) -- there must be something that thrives in the fall.

*Testing time and hopes of a green belt

*Friends and their families

*Day trips to new places

*An empty garage

*Reasonable expectations

Showing

2008-07-29T21:42:00.000-07:00

Today our homeschool group held a 'show and tell'. Briones brought her dad's old 'Ewok Village' and I brought our 'Talking Stick'. A few examples of other's treasures were...a tub of wild blackberries, a pouch of found sea glass, and a box of bones. I hope this becomes a regular thing.

*This photo and quote here don't have anything to do with one another..I just like 'em both and wanted to share!

"We are shut up in schools and college recitation rooms for ten or fifteen years, and come out at last with a bellyful of words and do not know a thing. We cannot use our hands, or our legs, or our eyes, or our arms. We do not know an edible root in the woods. We cannot tell our course by the stars, nor the hour of the day by the sun. It is well if we can swim and skate. We are afraid of a horse, of a cow, of a dog, of a cat, of a spider. Far better was the Roman rule to teach a boy nothing that he could not learn standing." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Weekend Restraint

2008-07-27T12:21:00.000-07:00

We went to Disneyland, I mean Ikea this weekend and somehow managed to escape with our wallet and dignity in place. It's not unlike the euphoric feeling of one Whole Foods trip with right arm intact. Almost impossible. I think the trick this time was staying awhile. We let Briones romp around the kid drop for an hour while mom and dad enjoyed a leisurely time together. After a relaxing lunch in the cafe, the "oooh, I must have that" pile had lost it's luster. It's the in and out impulse shopping that gets ya...if you are a shopaholic like me than you must understand. On a side note, I am really impressed with Ikea's fabric they sell by the yard. Very colorful and unique, and so many to choose from. It's enough incentive to learn how to sew. Almost.

We also went to Urban Ore, another Disneyland of sorts. I hadn't been since they moved to a warehouse on Ashby and it wasn't at all how I remembered it. It was fun nonetheless, and because we had no truck, we again left with wallet and dignity in place. This is a good thing, but we did have fun imagining a clawfoot tub for the garden, a mondo Bingo Board for the living room, and the steel Man Hole lid for the garden..kitchen..who cares where? It was a freakin' Man Hole Lid and I wanted it!

30 Days Done

2008-07-25T08:49:00.000-07:00

Another 30 days done. Yay! More than anything, I'm like wow, that & that happened just 30 days ago..?! A visit from an old friend, a wetland outing, a visit to the John Muir house..it all seems like an eternity ago. Doing marathons like this really puts things in perspective. Some months go by only as one big blur, but it's amazing what memories you can pack in when you are paying attention. Seeking out things, on purpose. Even seemingly mundane objects or moments. Reason #57 why I am loving a camera. And a blog.

Thirty

2008-07-25T08:29:00.000-07:00

Twenty Nine

2008-07-24T08:24:00.000-07:00

Twenty Eight

2008-07-23T19:17:00.000-07:00

Time flies, whether you are having fun or not. Might as well make the most of it. For some of us this means sleeping (cats are smart) and some of us (most of us?) like to whine and complain about how pressed for time we are and how miserable we are because of it (like myself, many times on this blog, I'm sure). Is this a female disease? An American disease? Feeling real angst about not getting everything done..day after day? Whatever the cause...it sounds more like future heart disease to me.

Well, I decided I am not going to do that anymore. Here's to CONTENTMENT. Here and now. Today.

"Why is life speeded up so? Why are things so terribly, unbearably precious that you can’t enjoy them, but can only wait breathless in dread of their going?"

-Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Twenty Seven

2008-07-22T21:50:00.000-07:00

A word is not the same with one writer as with another. One tears it from his guts. The other pulls it out of his overcoat pocket.

-Charles Peguy

Twenty Six

2008-07-21T20:16:00.001-07:00

I am so absorbed in the wonder of the earth and the life upon it that I cannot think of heaven and the angels. I have enough for this life.

-Pearl S. Buck

Twenty Five

2008-07-20T18:28:00.000-07:00

There has been a resurrection from deep in the garage. All sorts of interesting things have surfaced as we successfully declutter. Dust and leaded plastic aside..these toys are pretty cool. Now Paul gets to share his childhood obsession with his own little Jedi-ette. So, so, very cool.

Twenty Four

2008-07-19T17:28:00.001-07:00

Are you prepared? For anything? If disaster struck now, how long could your family eat or drink without relying on any outside sources? Would you have enough food stockpiled to carry your friend or neighbor through until...?

I've been thinking..dreaming of creating our food storage supplies for some time now. Using barrels and air tight containers, you would rotate from your oldest stock for daily meals and replenish when you can. The ultimate suburban homestead. And, the buying gets even cheaper for both containers and food when you pool families together and buy in super bulk.

An idea of what enough dry goods per person for a one year's supply might look like:

*400 lbs. Grains (oats, wheat, rice, pasta, flour)

*60 lbs. Legumes (split pea, pinto, black, white, lentils etc.)

*60 lbs. Sugar or Honey

*14 lbs. Powdered Milk

*8 lbs. Salt

*10 quarts Cooking Oil

*Water (2 weeks) 14 gallons per person (2 week reserve.)

Wow. In our world of screwy food and limitless options for dinner...it's a big reality check to think of food simply as NOURISHMENT. KILOCALORIES. STOMACH FILLER. VALUABLES.

All the anguish spent at Whole Foods..tormented..shall I have chard? Red, rainbow or green? Organic or not?

Yogurt? Nonfat, lowfat, whole? Greek or Cream Top. Let's not get started with milk. Or cheese. Or apples.

You think I'm crazy? Maybe. But it's all about a piece of mind. Perspective. There's a little lady right now in the bedroom right across the hall from me, who was born in 1926. She grew up in a time when milk was delivered and food was a privilege, not a RIGHT. And today, why should it make any difference if we live in a suburban rancher in a tract neighborhood or on a country ranch miles away from a grocery store? We are still responsible for ourselves and our families.

Twenty Three

2008-07-18T14:55:00.000-07:00

There are two distinct, interchangeable phases of life for me. One, where I glean mountains of motivation from other's writings. The other where I don't pick up a book for weeks or months at a time and sprint forward, flying free on my own.

I am thankful for both, although it's quotes like the one below that make a permanent mark. I love it!

"Stop reading for a moment, and imagine that you are going to die in one minute. The last things you are going to experience are reading these pages, sitting in this room, thinking and feeling what you are thinking and feeling right now. This is the end of your life. . . .You have no time to write a note or make a phone call. All you can do is experience what is, right now. This is a very simple exercise, but it is quite profound. It brings you into presence very quickly. You stop fighting, you stop needing, you stop being concerned with physical comfort, you stop wanting, you stop achieving, and you stop maintaining. Enlightenment, attainment, realization all become meaningless. You are just present."

-Ken McLeod

Twenty Two

2008-07-17T08:25:00.000-07:00

Good day sunshine. grumble.

A few weeks ago, I took down the curtains in our bedroom and have left them off since. The night sky from our bed is amazing, and I thought wow, this is just like camping..sort of. Then, morning comes and pow, the sun smacks you in the face. It's time to get up, whether you like it or not. This is probably a good thing.

Twenty One

2008-07-16T08:27:00.001-07:00

"That's all I want, that's all you need in life, is a little place for your stuff, ya know? I can see it on your table, everybody's got a little place for their stuff." -George Carlin

I've wondered what the focus of this blog should be. I feel antsy without one, like a messy house or a week without a projected menu. While blogging for only a short time, I was surprised to find out that I wasn't a terrific writer anymore. Writing came easy when I was younger, and angrier, and completely unabashedly aware. And now here and today, as a wife, parent and homemaker, I find myself muted, cautious, fearful and out of touch with myself and my surroundings..somewhere along the line (perhaps from the very beginning), I subscribed to the notion that new moms happily marinate in a state of overwhelm, burn out and the sickness of 'getting it all done'. That milestones are cookie cutter and will fit very nicely into the baby book slots. That all reasonable parenting challenges will be sufficiently remedied in the monthly Parenting Magazine column. And, that time spent creatively or introspectively is a guilt ridden special treat.

It's like banging a cast iron upside your head daily and then complaining of a headache.

The remedy is too simple. As Amy puts it so practically "..if you want to run faster, you have to run faster." Once you get it, you then achieve the freedom to decide whether faster is what you really wanted in the first place.

This blog, for now, serves as a journey through my own Braille Trail , awake and explorative with all senses, in hopes of encouraging more personal honesty and good vibrations. It's a reasonable rough draft, for now.

"How many of us are able to distinguish between the odors of noon and midnight, or of winter and summer, or of a windy spell and a still one? If man is so generally less happy in the cities than in the country, it is because all these variations and nuances of smell and sound are less clearly marked and lost in the general monotony of gray walls and cement pavements." -Lin Yutang

Twenty

2008-07-16T05:00:00.000-07:00

This photo reminds me of the skyrocketed gasoline prices. At first the crunch comes as a complete shock but then demands a reprioritization of lifestyle and home economics. I feel bad for those whose livelihood depend on a long and expensive commute...although in general, I believe the high prices are a blessing in disguise. It forces (at the very least), very real dialogue about better fuel sources.

"Our life is frittered away by detail. Simplify, simplify, simplify! I say, let your affairs be as two or three, and not a hundred or a thousand; instead of a million count half a dozen, and keep your accounts on your thumbnail." -Henry David Thoreau

Nineteen

2008-07-15T08:00:00.000-07:00

Eighteen

2008-07-14T00:00:00.000-07:00

Seventeen

2008-07-13T08:30:00.000-07:00

"It is good that fire should burn, even if it consumes your house; it is good that force should crush, even if it crushes you; it is good that rain should fall, even if it destroys your crops and floods your land. Plagues and pestilences attest to the constancy of natural law. They set us to cleaning our streets and houses and to readjusting our relations to outward nature. Only in a live universe could disease and death prevail. Death is a phase of life, a redistributing of the type. Decay is another kind of growth."

-John Burroughs

Sixteen

2008-07-12T00:00:00.000-07:00

Fifteen

2008-07-11T07:00:00.000-07:00

"We think work with the brain is more worthy than work with the hands. Nobody who thinks with his hands could ever fall for this."

-E.F. Schumacher

Fourteen

2008-07-10T23:00:00.000-07:00

"The idea that we are “stewards of the earth” is another symptom of human arrogance. Imagine yourself with the task of overseeing your body’s physical processes. Do you understand the way it works well enough to keep all its systems in operation? Can you make your kidneys function? . . . Are you conscious of the blood flow through your arteries? . . . We are unconscious of most of our body’s processes, thank goodness, because we’d screw it up if we weren’t. The human body is so complex, with so many parts. . . . The idea that we are consciously caretaking such a large and mysterious system is ludicrous."

-Lynn Margulis

Thirteen

2008-07-09T08:00:00.000-07:00

Here's a picture of our little man cat, who thinks he's pretty ferocious. From now on, I'll be keeping a better eye on him and his brother. There is a bobcat lurking in my backyard. I kid you not. I first saw something about 3 months ago, through the slats in the back fence, as it slinked by. The city girl in me thought I was going nuts, but still, I had a funny feeling that it was what it was. Then, last week, I saw it again from the kitchen window and knew immediately. It was a cat. For sure. It was about the size of a small labrador, so I'm thinking that eliminates it from being a mountain lion. After talking to some wild animal people, I now know I am not losing my mind. Bobcats love Turkey. And we've got Turkey. Lots of them, who find it amusing to sit in a row along our back fence from time to time. It's nice (and exciting!) to know that we humans haven't scared away absolutely everything that deserves to be here. I've got my camera ready.

Outside of the Box

2008-07-08T00:03:00.000-07:00

Why should my 5 year old pick a favorite color? Would she want to pick a favorite if we didn't urge her to? I cringe at these school worksheets we sometimes use in our homeschooling and how hollow and silly the focus is. Now, I'm not talking about the guy at Trader Joe's who wants to know what color balloon she prefers. She had better make a decision, and quickly.

I am instead talking about the way we choose to introduce the world to our little ones. Which flavor viewfinder we want them to try on first.

Sometimes it's blue, sometimes it's yellow. Yesterday it was red. But was it really? Could it have been more of a Burnt Sienna or a Red Violet? Perhaps it was an Ultra Red, Scarlet, Maroon, Mahogany or Magenta. How powerful would it be if we insisted our children NOT pick a favorite, and instead urged an exploration of each and every color's range, compatibility, emotion, strength, limitation and purpose in nature and everywhere else. Ultimately she will form preferences, but there is no rush.

Oh man. I'm flipping through this workbook here. What is your favorite animal. Favorite food. What do you want to be when you grow up. Either we have a lot of work to do, or this book is going in the garbage. I think both.

Twelve

2008-07-08T00:00:00.000-07:00

"When we try to pick out anything by itself, we find it hitched to everything else in the universe."

-John Muir

Eleven

2008-07-07T17:23:00.000-07:00

Ten

2008-07-06T08:00:00.000-07:00

In A Fog.

Nine

2008-07-05T21:00:00.001-07:00

Eight

2008-07-04T10:07:00.001-07:00

I sure love our country. Happy Independence Day!!

Seven

2008-07-03T07:00:00.000-07:00

Six

2008-07-02T08:26:00.000-07:00

I'm cheating here, but I could not decide, so there's 2 pics for today. Gianna came to visit today with the amazing, steadily sprouting Miss Lina. Too sweet.

Five

2008-07-01T08:01:00.000-07:00

Dinner for one? No tipped cups to sop up, no begging cats underfoot for mysteriously dropped salmon chunks (it was an accident mom!), no chatter or Briones' famous dinner and a show..

I love dinner for one. It's a treat. But only every once in a while. Otherwise I would really start to miss the theatrics. The noise. The mess. The love.

Four

2008-06-30T19:49:00.000-07:00

I had totally forgotten that my grandma used to call me 'petunia' when I was little. Petunia Bud to be exact. I wonder what else is stored away in that head of mine..

Three

2008-06-29T07:56:00.000-07:00

Do you ever see human qualities in your pets? A serious jaw line, a smile, a furrowed brow? This guy here trips me out all the time. If I threw a toupe on his head he would be a dashing young lad. Add some glasses and he's a little old man. Apparently I'm into my cats, entirely too much.

Two

2008-06-28T08:49:00.001-07:00

One

2008-06-27T18:14:00.000-07:00

There's something about this shot that makes me want to get a tattoo. At least a Henna one.

30 Days More

2008-06-26T06:01:00.000-07:00

I think it's time for another 30 day photo challenge. I've finally gotten to the point w/the Canon SLR where I'm no longer afraid to touch it, use it, or drop it. Now, I just need to take it off of that automatic switch and get down and dirty! And with you all watching, I'm sure to stay on track. Here again, I'm going for composition rather than photo quality, since I still don't quite understand how aperture and all that other jazz works together. I appreciate your help. And feedback. Or nothing at all is fine too.

Bring It On

2008-06-21T19:39:00.000-07:00

Hello summer. Your presence is noted here in California with 102 degree heat.

Because we are pretty relaxed homeschoolers, we could travel or do absolutely nothing anytime of the year..but there is something so unique, yet urgent about summer that screams adventure and yawns lazy..simultaneously. If things go as planned, we will be nothing but a trail of sand, sunscreen and dirty laundry. A quick blur as we dash in and out, only to refill the cooler and unload the memory cards.

There are signs that it's already begun. The swimsuits have not made it to the dresser in over a week.

Day camp. A rare opportunity for Briones to brush up on the newest potty talk and bizarre habits of hip kids aged 5-7. You know, important stuff. Also a rare opportunity for mom to sample what a traditional school schedule would feel like, mornings free with plenty of time for housework, grocery shopping and picking toes...uninterrupted. Yes, I totally get it now. And I do have to admit it's tempting...but no.

A drive to visit good friends and a good ol' fashioned pool party to celebrate Elisa's 4th. Barbecue, water wings, and a total amazement of where time has gone. And a promise to visit more often.

Keeping

2008-06-17T19:05:00.000-07:00

Back to decluttering...some things I won't be getting rid of. I wouldn't run back into a burning house for it, but, this is still a keeper.

Seek First to Understand. Then to Be Understood.

How to use the Talking Stick:

Only the person holding the talking stick is allowed to speak.

Once that person feels understood,

He or she passes the Talking Stick to the next person.

Caution: Use of the Talking Stick may result in amazing, synergistic results!

Sick

2008-06-14T13:37:00.000-07:00

Things To Do With A Horrendous, Vomitrocious Viral Visitor

-Get really high off of cold medicine and cut out 6 trillion paper doll clothes. Hide them until the first day you feel better and need to buy some time to recover the household.

-Watch a full episode of Maury because you lost the remote and are too dead to get up and change the channel. The poor girl never did find her baby daddy.

-Consider writing Proctor & Gamble into your will, or at the very least writing those dear people a thank you letter for the lifesaving powers of NYQUIL.

-Cry like a baby. Have your young daughter take pity on you and proceed to 'operate' with clothes hangers and headbands.

-Look on the bright side. You are losing weight!

-Smile and bite your tongue when young daughter returns home, blasts through the door and jumps right on your stomach. Because she forgot you were sick and is just so happy to see you.

-Sit at the computer and write this post..because you are just so, so pleased to be finally vertical.

Nature's Way

2008-06-10T17:44:00.000-07:00

After a firecrackerish, wire crossing type of day...it only makes sense that we would happen upon some grass fire drama on the way home. Billowing smoke in the air? You bet we've got to find it. The gate had a padlock and the cows were trapped, really freaked out, and ran right into the fire.

Right, not the best idea guys. On with Plan B.

Wait! Wrong way again!

Okay, the brave men have finally pointed them in the right direction (there were some big bulls in there). These bovines really seem to have a death wish. Not sure where they will go unless someone can break that gate open, but at least they are buying some time. No one wants burgers tonight.

Two minutes later...

Another minute and a fire tornado later (an UNBELIEVABLE sight, I was so stunned, I forgot to take a picture), it was total chaos. I saw the very real fear in the faces of the families who lived just yards away, just across from the fenceline. Not a fireman in sight. And then I heard it. It wasn't the crackling of the burning so much...as it was the sound of the FORCE, the RAGE, the monumental animal that was the fire. T-E-R-R-I-F-Y-I-N-G.

It's a witness like this that makes me feel so...small and HUMAN. And grateful. And respectful, but mostly ALIVE. It's a strangely awesome feeling.(And perfect inspiration and a new theme as I declutter my own living space. If I had only 5 minutes to grab the most important belongings....)

Freedom

2008-06-10T00:07:00.001-07:00

I've been bitten by the de-clutter bug. Everything is going. Practically. Like the blow out party favors we unearthed from the depths of the garage. All 15 of them. Don't ask. They got their second life...a 5 minute eye poking blast session, and it's done, they are outta here!

I'm frustrated and done with the what if's. I feel suffocated like the 7 pairs of unzippable jeans. That need to JUST GO. Like the 10 boxes of crayons because they were only 20 cents a piece at Walmart. I won't stop until I can do a running double cartwheel in the garage. We are crammed here with our nostalgia. Great grandma's stuff. An impressive scrapbook supply collection for someone who does not scrapbook. Baseball cards and star wars figures (not my department, but I'm hoping). Inherited furniture. Anyone need a pool table? Or maybe we'll clear everything else except for the pool table. And then we'll throw a party. And then we can play pool. Wow, what a concept.

The best is the 5 years of stockpiled homeschooling materials, saved for just the right moment. We've had tons of right moments already, perfect opportunities really, but I haven't been able to find anything when I need it. And in a 5 year old's time zone...the need is NOW. And then it's gone. It's all backwards anyway and not how life and learning has worked for us. We barely ever start with the book. We start with the passion and then maybe go get the book. Which is why all the other stuff is still in the garage.

I cannot live in the moment until this stuff is gone. It really does matter. And it's not just stuff. It's procrastination, stagnation...a choke hold. And it's all going. With a little energy from this awesome post the compact revisited.

Last Crusade

2008-06-09T09:15:00.000-07:00

Indiana (Jones, that is) took San Francisco by storm this weekend. The city will never be the same...

FoodStuffs

2008-06-05T22:00:00.000-07:00

We ate from the garden for the first time. Whew! What a difference in taste, color, texture. From plant to plate in 10 minutes. Extraordinary. Kind of silly to think that it has been more than a decade since I have experienced food fresh from my garden (I'm not counting kitchen herbs). So, it's a real treat.

I also hunted down a $60 cookbook I've been wanting ($20 cookbook, $40 parking ticket) but the Pot Roast was priceless. (Amy, if you are reading, it's pg.174 and thank you for the awesome recommendation!). The recipes are actually mostly meat free and all whole foods, we just went right for the hunk o' meat, go figure :)

LetterBox oh letterbox, where art thou?

2008-06-04T09:00:00.000-07:00

LetterBoxing, the ultimate treasure hunt. Pick from many U.S. parks, print out clues, and using numbered steps and compass coordinates...hunt for a box hidden by a stranger who finds joy in leading curious folks on a wild goose chase.

And a wild goose chase it was. The kids were ON IT, searching under bushes, rocks and trees for the magical box. I'm not sure which was more exciting..the actual chase or the mystery of what was actually going to be inside of the box.

We never found the box and the kids handled it like champs. Was it our compass reading? An overzealous park maintenance worker? A recent explorer who didn't put it back? We'll never know. But we've definitely inspired the Indiana Jones in all of us.

Inspiration

2008-06-02T09:14:00.000-07:00

There's a post that I re-read when I need a refresher on parenting and children. Sometimes I go astray from my role and her needs. And for some reason, I am always surprised that her needs are no different than ours..she may be little but she's still human.

She appreciates gentle guidance but the freedom to negotiate on her own terms. And the right to fall and fall again. She wishes for a patient advocate who preaches less and listens more.

Work in progress.

A Little Squirrely

2008-05-29T19:02:00.000-07:00

There's something strange in the air today. Either that or we've got a little Dr. Doolittle going on.

A Tree's Death -- Child's Perspective

2008-05-27T17:43:00.000-07:00

I wanted to share this from last week. We drove by this unfortunate act of nature.

I think Briones felt more compassion for the death of the tree than for the man who was out of a car. She collected 3 orphaned twigs and took them home since they had lost their mother.

I chuckled to myself and wondered if my little angel would one day wind up in one of these photos..taking a stance to protect an ancient oak grove from being chopped down or something.

No Comment

2008-05-25T12:53:00.000-07:00

I found a nice surprise over at Shutter Sisters today. I told Briones see, I knew you would be famous one day, but she said no mom, I mean for real famous, with a guitar and everything.

2008-05-23T08:43:00.000-07:00

I am feeling greatful for weekends now. I guess that includes Fridays too, the anticipation is often just as great. We hadn't had weekends together as a family in over 3 years, and now that my husband has come off shift work, we have all weekends and we are a much different family. Before, when we did have a rare weekend, we would chase our tails in this psychotic frenzy of packing as many activities in as possible. Well, it was more me. Paul would have been just as happy doing nothing.

I'm taking Heather's lead today and feeling so durn greatful about a few other things too.

An e-mail from my 19 year old brother who is roaming around Europe, solo, with a bicycle and a hammock.

Stellar friends and a healthy family.

A three day weekend!

Police Officer Jiang Xiaojuan who breastfeeds China's quake victims and says "It is a mother's reaction and a basic duty as a police officer to help."

Snapshot

2008-05-22T08:53:00.000-07:00

New sparring gear. She's under there somewhere.

Birthdays

2008-05-20T17:51:00.000-07:00

We celebrated my grandma's birthday last month and almost lit the house on fire. Really, it's amazing.. 82 candles on a cake will cause a pretty fierce updraft like you've never seen. It's the tradition -- you get as many candles as you are. No cheating with the preformed number candles. What a great feeling of confidence it was for her to blow out every single one of those candles -- or maybe she was just euphoric from the lack of oxygen to the brain.

Remodel

2008-05-19T21:51:00.000-07:00

We've been having a blast with this craft idea from the amazing Crafty Crow (thanks Amy for the sidebar inspiration!). A doll house made out of cardboard and magazine cutouts..of course! Add in a few polly pockets and some junk drawer scraps and you've got hours of entertainment. And some cheap therapy for those of us who have big dreams and a lust for expensive couches.

Quick Read

2008-05-15T18:00:00.000-07:00

Read. This. Book. Now.

You will never regard compulsory government schooling for our little ones in the same way..so maybe don't read it then :) It's a real eye opener though and it clarified for me the difference between getting schooled and getting an education. Two very different things.

Laid Out

2008-05-14T13:42:00.000-07:00

This is how I feel today, as a nasty viral thing pulsates through my body -- Laid Out. And by the way, no..that is not a hairy sausage. And yes, that is a cat and no, he is not fat. He is big boned and well loved.

Stop, Drop & Roll

2008-05-13T15:56:00.000-07:00

Not too many better ways to spend a Tuesday morning than at Firehouse Station 1. Heather knew the captain so they really rolled out the red carpet, or so it seemed. I got the overwhelming impression that these guys really enjoyed their jobs. Around these parts, it's hard to find folks who take real pride in their occupation, and it's extra nice when they pass that vibe on to the kidlets.

Mommy Bloggers

2008-05-12T23:08:00.000-07:00

A morning show last week featured the popular blogger dooce.com , who not only has been coined the queen of mommy bloggers, but is also swirling amongst controversy about whether or not it is appropriate to blog about your children. Granted, this particular lady's daily diary humor about life (including 4 year old daughter) is not for the faint hearted, but it all seems in jest although the controversy remains the same..is it okay to post pictures and stories of your kids..in fear of upsetting or embarrassing them later in life..or even exploiting them?

Come on. Lighten up people. These are kids. Kids do funny things. And kids are cute and we like to take pictures of them. And moms are real and tired and if they even GET the chance to sit at a computer undisturbed, they arent going to share their whole freakin lives with you. Just little snippets, snapshots or whines. What you see on the blog is just a tiny fragment of the day.

But I do have to occasionally remind myself of just that when I peruse the ones where the homeschooling mom of 6 bakes stunning pies daily and sews all her kid's clothes. Or the amazing designer mom who presents decorating dilemmas along with photos of an already sparkling home. We don't get to see what's inside those closets or what else in that home needed tending to instead of those pies. I think I went off on a tangent here, but the point is..lighten up. The blogworld celebrates people's specialties, it's inspirational and often comforting to identify with a mom halfway across the country who might be having the same day as you are. Kids are kids, and might be grateful later for a digital scrapbook of their lives and mommy's honest daily thoughts (I hope).

Snapshots

2008-05-11T10:18:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we went on a whirlwind birthday party tour, ending the day at a very special friend's house where I had the delight of taking some pics of her awesome family.

Afterwards, I wondered about the pressure a professional photographer must feel. They are so truly amazing. While I'm still fiddling with knobs and controls, the moment is already gone. And what about situations where there's never much of a moment in the first place. These people are being paid to create one...one way or the other. And a big day like a wedding- hah! Amazing. It's not like you can say, sorry folks. None of the shots worked out actually. We are going to have to have another.

The Mother Load

2008-05-11T09:10:00.000-07:00

my brother -- May 3, 2008

Big smooches to all you mommas out there today. Our work is never done.

We've got our own version of a Hallmark commercial. To celebrate mother's day I have a big zit in the middle of my forehead. It's 9:36 and poor husband is still snoozing away, sick as a dog. Firecracker daughter is still fast asleep because she partied until midnight. Great-grandma has a threatening cough. I just sent my mom a hallmark e-card and I'll be visiting Paul's mom today in the hospital who is going on her 6th straight day now in that God awful place. The fridge is empty and the garden is dry. Who wants breakfast in bed anyway? It's just one more sheet to wash after I spill o.j. on it. There's only a quick second to stop and smell the roses and then we are off!! Off to life, and I choose to be present for every minute of it. The good, bad and the ugly. To feel alive, to feel useful and purposeful, to be a part of a living breathing functioning family is how I want to celebrate motherhood. If I need a day off, then I take it, and truthfully, I often take several. Just not today.

Our work is seriously never done. Here's to motherhood! Here's to life!

Happy Mother's Day!!

2008-05-10T15:11:00.000-07:00

my mom -- may 3, 2008

Weird

2008-05-08T07:59:00.000-07:00

Dad worked last weekend so Briones and I went to play in San Francisco @ the How Weird Street Fair. Totally uninhibited..loud, loud music, wild and colorful costumes, juicing stations and smoky barbecue. I am such a city girl at heart but haven't visited nearly enough since my nearly 8 year disappearance into suburbia. Wow! What a different person I have become. Different in many good ways, but still longing for those carefree and whimsical days where time and place don't matter so much. Sitting in the city on this sunny sunday afternoon at this funny fair was just the recharge (or taste) that I needed. And then I returned to my comfy home of lawns and mini vans where the parking comes easy and the bathrooms are clean. It's still hard to choose but you gotta love the bay area for having it all!

30 Days Done

2008-05-06T20:52:00.000-07:00

Thank you for your feedback on my 30 day adventure. I've been bitten by the photo bug and there's no turning back. Flikr is my new best friend. As well as Digital SLR Photography For Dummies...which I just remembered I need to renew again. And again and again..

Thirty -- sfmoma

2008-05-05T14:36:00.000-07:00

Twenty Nine

2008-05-05T07:54:00.000-07:00

Twenty Eight -- Tuckered Out

2008-05-04T20:29:00.001-07:00

Twenty Seven

2008-05-03T07:36:00.000-07:00

Twenty Six

2008-05-02T21:39:00.000-07:00

Twenty Five -- Moment in Time

2008-05-01T17:13:00.000-07:00

Twenty Four

2008-04-30T21:50:00.000-07:00

Twenty Three

2008-04-29T20:28:00.000-07:00

Twenty Two - Flirty

2008-04-28T17:54:00.000-07:00

Twenty One -- Street Performers

2008-04-27T23:16:00.000-07:00

Twenty -- Bird Watching

2008-04-26T08:12:00.000-07:00

Click

2008-04-25T20:38:00.000-07:00

My new camera has arrived! Well, it didn't just arrive -- I groveled, begged, and forfeited my gifts for the next 2 years..but I couldn't be happier. I think my husband caved just so I would shut up (useful tactic ladies!). For you enthusiasts out there, it's a canon rebel xsi, and guess what? I have no idea how to use it! For now, I am adjusting to the pure honesty of this camera. I'm talking about the up close nitty gritty detail that shows up. Like those bristles on my husband's face. Or those dreadful dry cracks on my hands. (Hey, it's gardening season!).

Good news... since I now hide in the tree to get a shot of my family (who have been saying cheese for a couple of weeks now), I can get one of those super long lenses and get good close ups :) This furry guy may be the only one in my house right now who isn't tired of having his picture taken. Or maybe not...

Nineteen

2008-04-25T20:00:00.000-07:00

Eighteen

2008-04-24T18:43:00.000-07:00

Seventeen

2008-04-23T21:21:00.000-07:00

Earth Day

2008-04-22T16:55:00.000-07:00

This is the first earth day that I feel genuinely tuned in to our impact on the planet. On the same token, I have never before felt more faithful that no matter what, mother earth's forces will ultimately prevail. No matter the prognosis, she will have the final word. We still need the baby steps though, the global awareness and the neighborhood trash cleanups. We need them for ourselves and for our fresh children, who will ultimately be put to the task of cleaning up our mess. What a beautiful gift though to be surrounded by folks who feel the same way, reinforcements, if you will. Our Homeschool Group today had a gentle earth day celebration, hosted by an equally gentle and lovely momma, who shared a favorite book Brother Eagle, Sister Sky with everyone. Watching the group of kidlets elbow through to get a good view of the brilliant illustrations, assured me that somehow, in some way, the army has assembled.

Sixteen

2008-04-22T10:14:00.000-07:00

MAD Monday

2008-04-21T13:38:00.000-07:00

Thanks to some motivation from a friend and her kidlets, we are back out on the Making-A-Difference Monday mission, bringing the kids to pick up garbage at the local waterfront. There's never a shortage of it! It was fun to watch them tromping around in the mud, getting stuck in mud...did I mention mud?

Fifteen -- Pollywogs

2008-04-21T09:35:00.000-07:00

Fourteen

2008-04-20T20:19:00.000-07:00

Thirteen

2008-04-19T23:09:00.000-07:00

Twelve -- Canopy

2008-04-18T19:15:00.000-07:00